The theme for January's NaBloPoMo on BlogHer is PRESSURE. I think it's pretty funny, considering that we've just left the most pressure-filled time of year. Pressure to get all your shopping done. Pressure to meet the expectations of family and friends. Pressure to make deadlines at work, despite the holiday craziness. Your blood-pressure rising because of all the traffic and lines and chaos. I honestly feel like here, now, just after midnight on New Year's Eve, I finally feel the pressure breaking. Sweet, sweet relief.January marks new beginnings for everyone, of course. For me, it has long been the month I have to make a few decisions about my life. I gave myself till January to figure out how to make things work with two jobs. I gave myself till now to figure out if I could stay in the Pacific Northwest. And if I can keep working in retail.
I haven't made all the decisions yet. Luckily, the month isn't over yet. But I did make one important decision. I decided to resign from one of my jobs. A few months ago, it would have been hard to choose between them. But the holidays showed me which one would be more stable for me, which would provide better, and which would offer more opportunities in the future. Thus, my time with Lush ends mid-January.
I have been a fan of Lush for many years now. And leaving the company will not lessen my love of the products. I will truly miss seeing the people I've had the pleasure of working with, both at my current store and those I got to see every so often at training. But, the moment I gave my notice, I felt that bubble of pressure in my chest burst.
I don't know how people manage two jobs in the same field. I honestly thought my two would balance each other out, but they actually proved to be too much together. I was tired all through the holidays, I had very little time to myself and when I got sick right before Christmas, it hit me hard. I really think I am getting too old for this. But that's okay, it helped me make a firm decision and it will help me figure things out from here on out. Maybe my theme for this year should be reducing pressure in all aspects of my life.
I can definitely relate to this! When I lost my job in October, I went home and just felt... relieved. It's amazing how much pressure we have in our lives without even realizing it.
ReplyDeleteAnd sometimes we realize there is pressure, but we can't figure out what's causing it till it's gone! Always makes me feel so ridiculous once I've figured it out.
DeleteI also recently had a revelation re job and feeling pressure. I have a fairly enjoyable part-time job. But over the past several months I have found myself feeling very resentful each day when I had to stop writing in order to go to work. I was thinking of various exit strategies so that I could write full time. On further examination I am starting to wonder if my feelings of resentment are more due to my mismanagement of my writing time rather than the job. I am going to try to manage my writing time better so that when I do have to stop and go to the other job, I will feel satisfied with my progress rather than angry about lack thereof. We'll see how it goes.
ReplyDeleteThat is rough - trying to figure out if the job is the problem or if you need to change something. Between the two jobs I was working, I was getting nothing done on the blog, but I was also getting nothing done in any other aspect of my life. Being able to enjoy some quiet time and get things done around the house has meant that I've been able to actually enjoy writing again. My brain was too clogged and I was too stressed before. Good luck figuring it all out!
Delete