Over the years I believe that I have become more capable of seeing things from various perspectives. Even when I get pissed off these days, I'm usually pretty good at keeping it to myself, taking a deep breath and considering where the other person is coming from.
My parents are total opposites, but one thing they have in common is that they have both always encouraged me to take a step back from my own feelings. To problem-solve instead of creating conflict by only thinking of myself. I feel I benefit by each of their views on the world and the people in it. And I feel like I finally, after many years, have met that challenge of not just thinking about my own view on things.
I am also very lucky in my friends. Whomever I call with a problem won't just take my side, they'll try to help me understand. Granted, there are times when you just want someone to commiserate. But as I've grown older and seen more of the world, I feel like it's a lot healthier for me to gain more understanding, to try to see why people act the way they do. In most cases, just realizing that the issue isn't what you thought can help you move past it. And forgiving people, letting things go, does you the greater service anyway.
So here's the not-so-great part. As hard as I try to understand other people... As much as I want to move forward... I have a friend I can't quite forgive. Trust that was broken in a very strange way. And even though I'm not actively angry, I can't reconcile my feelings with his. It's crazy that you can miss someone so much, but feel like you just can't let them back in. With all the perspective this life has granted me so far, it's quite sad to not be able to just forgive someone whom I love so much.
Which leads me to the conclusion that perspective doesn't always solve problems. While I'm glad to have it, sometimes the hurt isn't so easily healed. I feel like I should be ending with something more positive, but sometimes things end badly.
My parents are total opposites, but one thing they have in common is that they have both always encouraged me to take a step back from my own feelings. To problem-solve instead of creating conflict by only thinking of myself. I feel I benefit by each of their views on the world and the people in it. And I feel like I finally, after many years, have met that challenge of not just thinking about my own view on things.
I am also very lucky in my friends. Whomever I call with a problem won't just take my side, they'll try to help me understand. Granted, there are times when you just want someone to commiserate. But as I've grown older and seen more of the world, I feel like it's a lot healthier for me to gain more understanding, to try to see why people act the way they do. In most cases, just realizing that the issue isn't what you thought can help you move past it. And forgiving people, letting things go, does you the greater service anyway.
So here's the not-so-great part. As hard as I try to understand other people... As much as I want to move forward... I have a friend I can't quite forgive. Trust that was broken in a very strange way. And even though I'm not actively angry, I can't reconcile my feelings with his. It's crazy that you can miss someone so much, but feel like you just can't let them back in. With all the perspective this life has granted me so far, it's quite sad to not be able to just forgive someone whom I love so much.
Which leads me to the conclusion that perspective doesn't always solve problems. While I'm glad to have it, sometimes the hurt isn't so easily healed. I feel like I should be ending with something more positive, but sometimes things end badly.
Sometimes things are
just what they are
and nothing more.
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