Monday, January 20, 2014


There is a fine line between trying to make a better life for yourself and wasting the life you have by wishing for something else.  Bemoaning your circumstances may be an occasional inevitability, but if you are spending time every week wishing and hoping and dreaming, but never doing, then chances are you will never get any of what you want.  Or, even worse, when it finally falls into your lap in some shape, you won't have any appreciation for it.  There's a good chance it still won't make you happy.  Everything we strive for requires effort.  And more than just a little.

I have a good friend who, by living his life the way he does, has managed to inadvertently teach me how not to live mine.  It's a bit of a sad thing, really.  I wish him all the best.  What I'm really wishing for him is that he will someday appreciate where he is in his life.  He is one of those people who is constantly in a grass-is-greener mode.  He has convinced himself that what he has for a life isn't nearly good enough.  And he is always looking for the next best thing.  He is impatient for things to fall into place, angry that they haven't, and too blinded by all that impatience and frustration to see what he has right in front of him.  He's even admitted that there's a chance that he'll just never be happy.

It isn't about looking at someone "less fortunate" and being grateful for the roof over your head (though that doesn't hurt).  After all, there are quite a few wealthy people who are utterly miserable.  I know a few myself and I am not remotely jealous of their lives.  I may barely make ends meet right now, but I'll be damned if I'm not happy anyway.  Even on the days when I am emotional and moody, seeing someone I like at work can wipe that right out of my head.  What amazes me more is that I have somehow found myself thinking, "Enough of this, do something productive and you'll get past it."  Crazy how well that works, but it works because I choose for it to work.  Sounds nutty, right?  I'm actually doing it right now.  And the moment I set my fingers on the keyboard, I knew I'd be okay.  I knew that the sadness that was starting to take a stab at me wouldn't be able to hold its ground. 
Some what-ifs are better
left to daydreams, of course.

Look, there is nothing wrong with wanting more out of your life.  There's nothing wrong with wanting a better life for yourself.  But there is something terribly wrong with not living the life you have with at least appreciation for all that you have worked for and all that you have been given.  As for all those dreams you have, what are you doing to make them happen?  Even if it's something small, it's still something.

So as I said before, everything in life requires effort.  And I'm okay with that, because when all of my hard work pays off in even the smallest way, that success is so much sweeter.  And the failures that come here and there, no longer seem insurmountable.  Scary, sometimes, yes.  But life is about constant change and change can frighten us if we allow it to.

Now I have a question, especially for my fellow NaBloPoMo-ers, since we do have a theme to go with this month.  Do you feel like the worst pressure on us is that which we put on ourselves?  I do wonder.

Talking is a hydrant in the yard and writing is a faucet upstairs in the house.  Opening the first takes the pressure off the second.  
                                                                                                ~Robert Frost


  1. I agree, life can be difficult, yet when we can accept that and make the most of what we have contentment becomes our companion. Thought provoking.

  2. i tried to post a comment twice...and i couldn't remember my wordpress stuff! this hit the spot. ;)


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